Picks of the Week: His Name is Bruce
Week of June 7th, 2008
It’s Bruce Campbell theme this week, so grab your boomsticks and gimme some sugar baby! (those are quotes from his films)
Movie: Alien Apocalypse
Probably my favorite Bruce Campbell movie after Army of Darkness. Bruce plays an astronaut who has been away from earth for 40+ years and returns to find it overrun by aliens! The reason this movie is so awesome, aside from Campbell himself, is that the aliens are hilarious. Some of their dialog is the funniest stuff I’ve ever heard, especially the ‘Humans are our favorite delicacy…after wood!’ part. That’s the part that stands out in my mind. But the whole ‘humans leading the resistance against the aliens’ plot becomes so great and so campy that it’s hard not to love this movie. If you love Bruce you’ll love this one, but even if you don’t, you should be able to enjoy it as it’s full of great cheesy one liners and moments.
Family Guy is a Terrible Show
Back in 1999, I fell into the evil comedy trap that Seth Macfarlane set for many an impressionable youth. I thought it was the funniest TV Show I’d ever seen, and I recall watching the first episode and telling all my friends about it the next day at school. I continued to watch the show when I could, and while I never got as excited about it as I did for The Simpsons back in the day, I was notably saddened when the show was canceled. Naturally I bought the DVD sets when they first came out, and because of that I was able to watch the entire series without planning it around the TV schedule. Again, I thought it was hilarious. I watched all the episodes many times, and quoting it became a natural expression between my friends and I.
Naturally, I was excited when I heard it was coming back. I watched the first new episode with baited breath, and when it finally aired I was…underwhelmed. It didn’t seem like the show I remembered and loved. I watched the next few episodes and it seemed more and more like it wasn’t a good show anymore. It just wasn’t that funny. Of course I decided that ‘it was better before it came back’ but re-watching those episodes now, I realize just how wrong I was on that account.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized just how terrible the television show Family Guy was. And it’s even more aggravating because everyone seems to think it’s comedic genius. People quote it to me and talk about how hilarious it was when Peter farted for 5 minutes because it’s just so zany that way! So while I’m sure this little article will gain me a lot of haters, I think it will be worth it to open the eyes of many impressionable youth out there who may read this.
Submitted for your approval, I am going to convince you that Family Guy is the worst cartoon ever created and that your favorite show sucks.
Summer Has Just Begun
So today was a looong day as we had our ‘Fam Tour’ (Familiarization Tour) for the southwestern area of Alberta. Basically we had to drive around in a bus and visit various tourist attractions so we can tell people visiting the Empress Theatre about them. I’m quite sleepy now, and they fed me way too much food. But there will be a full Trip Report for that later, once I get all the pictures uploaded.
Things have changed drastically in the past month, and I’m still adjusting. I’m infinitely happy that I got this job at the Theatre for the summer because otherwise I might have been going out of my mind bored. They’re all great people I work with too, and while we may be sick of each other when August ends, for now I’m having a blast. Also we found out today that we can go horseback riding/whitewater rafting for free since we work in the ‘tourism industry’ of Alberta. So that’s probably something we’ll do later this month, and I’m super excited for that. It’s half research as I have to ride a fake horse in the one play we’re doing so this will make it possible to be more realistic. Let’s hope!
Have I mentioned how freaking nervous I am for this production? One of the plays I have a small(er) part and I’m already off book. So I’m not too worried about that one, but the other one I play the lead role and the character has like 20 monologues throughout the play. Not only that but I need to make convincing interactions with a fake/invisible horse and that will be the most challenging part. I think it will be a great experience for me though.
I’ve decided I’m going to try to become more active in the drama community next year during school. I was always kind of weary of getting involved in those things as my first year I got hurt pretty bad by the drama students. But I’m more confident now, and I’m SO excited for The BFG next spring, which I’m going to work my ass off for because I want to be in that play SO bad. I’ve also started writing more, and I hope to have the first draft of my current play done by the time summer is over. Then I have some ideas for more plays to write, and if I never get these produced I won’t mind because I enjoy the writing process. But maybe a Theatre Xtra would be a good place to try my hand at getting some of my writing produced?
So I am still trying to find my place in the world. Corny I know, but it’s true. I’ve never really had a ’solid’ group of friends or people that I connect with in all aspects. I guess I can think of that as a positive thing, that I’m so ‘unique’ that there is no one else like me, but it still is a hard thing to go through. I’m really thankful to have so many great friends that care about me, but I still feel forgotten and/or out of place most of the time. This may sound like I’m being all emo again, but I’m honestly not trying to sound that way. I have learned a lot about myself the past few years, and I realize that I need to worry more about enjoying the ride than looking for a destination.
I like driving metaphors, I dunno why.
Picks of the Week: I’ve Made a Huge Mistake
Week of May 31st, 2008
I’m trying to make themes to these, but it’s hard to do within the five items. I’m pretty sure 3 of the 5 work with this theme though, so shut up. I’m also trying to pick things that not everyone in the world know about. Here we go!
Movie: Oldboy
A very dark, very disturbing Korean film that took me by surprise. I had never watched too many foreign language films (cause my language is the best obviously) and therefore was never expecting such a complex, intricately woven tale of revenge and betrayal. I wrote that last sentence hoping they’ll use it and quote me on the back of a DVD box one day. Anyway, There are some cool action scenes, like a long hallway battle that is done in one shot that is really epic and awesome, as well as some interesting plot devices which I appreciated quite a bit if I wasn’t a little disturbed by them. Shyamalan, take note. This is the proper use of a so called ‘twist’ in the story.
Children Don’t Like Being Crows
This was the awesome cake my mom made me for my birthday party a few weeks ago. It’s probably the greatest thing ever created. (It’s a dinosaur)
So yesterday was my first school booking for a day long workshop at the Empress. We had a class of 19 grade 5 kids come to the theater so we could teach them how to act crazy and create stories. I had a little bit of experience teaching children during my Theater for Young Audiences class, but I was still a little nervous. Kids are hard to predict, and sometimes there are perfectly happy and well behaved little angels and other times there are evil little miscreants who never listen and hate everything about you. So I went into it with a positive attitude, and while they weren’t nearly as bad as I thought there was still some little punks who we immediately recognized as ‘trouble makers.’ I’m just glad Jeremy was there to act as the ‘head honcho’ and wrangle the kids into shape when needed.
For the first part of the day we just did some drama games, and for the most part there wasn’t much worth noting. At one point however, Jeremy had to stop everyone and talk to them ’sternly’ because everyone was running into each other and there was a possibility of getting hurt. As he was giving a little talk to the kids, the teacher piped in and started talking about how ‘This is what I’ve been going through all year, I can’t believe this is still happening ahhhh’ and it was a little awkward. It seemed like the teacher was really stressed over her kids and was happy to get the year over with. When it came time for lunch she asked Jer to come with her and the kids to the park because she might not ‘be able to handle them’ alone. WHAT? You are their TEACHER lady. Maybe you chose the wrong profession?
After lunch was when we made a little mini play with the kids. We each had a third of the kids and made the beginning, middle, and end to a story (Hansel and Gretel) separately. So afterwards we all showed them in order and it was pretty interesting. But the worst part was trying to figure out how to cast the kids, I had three boys and three girls, all the boys wanted Hansel and two girls wanted Gretel (the third didn’t care and didn’t seem to want to do anything at all). So I had to make some executive decisions and choose everyone’s part. The one girl was happy with being a wolf, while the one boy was okay with being the evil witch. The third boy, however, HATED HATED HATED being a crow, and sat down on the edge of the stage and pouted. He said he didn’t want to do ANYTHING anymore, so I asked if he wanted to do Math homework instead, and he was like ‘YEAH’ which took me by surprise so I asked if he HAD any of it with him, and he said no. So I was able to make him happy with being a crow since he was allowed to run down the aisle flying up to the stage. Kids are strange.
The weirdest thing of the day, though, was after the kids left. Last week Gerard (Artistic Director of the Empress) invited all the summer staffers to watch the Rolling Stones concert dvd (Shine a Light) by Martin Scorcese and eat pizza. We had no idea why this was happening, but he made it sound like it was pretty much mandatory. So that was supposed to happen yesterday and we waited around. We were corralled into the theater’s balcony and he gave us all sheets of paper with ‘STAFF MEETING’ written on top which was strange enough because we weren’t told it was a meeting. Then he made a point to announce at the beginning that he wasn’t expecting the summer staff to be here…even though he INVITED US! Then we had the pizza (which was pretty bad actually) and they started the movie. It was ONLY the summer staff by about halfway through the film and I fell asleep watching it. Honestly there is only so much of Mick Jagger’s old wrinkly ass waving in front of my face that I can take. Wouldn’t it be embarrasing if he was your grandfather? I guess only slightly. And you’d be pretty rich, so…
The drummer was the coolest looking grandfather ever though. Anyway it was pretty strange that we were pretty much forced to sit through this movie when no one else was even watching it. Oh well, afterwards I got some fresh popcorn! (we get free pop and popcorn there)
Picks of the Week: Favorites
Week of May 24th, 2008
For this inaugural week, I’m going to go with my favorite (or at least current favorite) picks.
Movie: Magnolia
Still one of my favorite movies, this is such a beautiful film and I loved every minute of it. The actors were all phenomenal (including Tom Cruise whom I normally despise) and the story really moved me. The movie was written around an Aimee Mann lyric which is spoken by one of the characters as well, and the majority of the movie is done to Aimee Mann songs and it is really well done. I believe this movie is what initiated my secret man love for Paul Thomas Anderson and I am kicking myself for still not having seen There Will Be Blood.
Exodus
Best Propaganda poster ever
I have officially started my job at the Empress Theater in Fort Macleod, and I can tell it’s going to be a busy/rewarding summer. On top of the two plays we will be putting together and performing, we’ll also do guided tours of the theater itself (with spiffy blue polo golf shirts as uniforms!) and drama camps/workshops for kids later on in the summer! I am pretty excited for it actually, it feels a lot like my Theater for Young Audiences class I took last semester except this time, I get paid!
Since I’ll be working there pretty hardcore this summer, my job at HMV is going to take a backseat, and I’ll probably work one shift a week or so there. But Ryland, Jen and Dave have all submitted resignation letters, and James says he might be planning to as well, and Cam’s contract is up in the end of May, so that leaves myself, Kent, and Adam. Adam makes his own schedule and is really just a receiver and Kent is in summer school, so he’s only getting two shifts a week or so. So…I have no idea what’s going to happen with the store. Really they should have been hiring people way back in February because now they are scrambling. I guess we’ll have to see what happens here, but it is not looking good!
Nestea makes some specialty iced tea called Vitao and I had a Mandarin Orange one today and it’s delicious and (possibly) nutritious. I may be drinking much more of those. Also, the mall has a new little sandwich shop called Café Express which is a pretty good price and pretty tasty (sandwich + 2 kinds of salads + chocolate milk for 8 bucks!). Looks like I found a new place to eat for my lunch breaks!
Old People
I saw a really old man driving a motorized scooter today and it was really awesome. Not the sit down, wheelchair type things, but an actual scooter that is similar to a bicycle. I’ve never seen that before. I think that, in general, old people are either a) really hilarious/awesome or b) really cranky and mean. There really is no middle ground once you make it over 70 years old. I definitely hope to be of the former category when I’m that age!
In other news, I’ve tried to maintain my sanity this summer by delving deep into the world of video games. Granted I’ve been in this world for the majority of my life, but I’ve been so out of my mind bored with Carli gone that I’m playing much more than I should be. It also has to do with the new Grand Theft Auto game coming out and me being totally enjoying my experiences with said game. It’s one of the more ‘realistic’ games I’ve played before and it’s pretty entertaining to run around shoving people and making them drop their shopping bags (which they never retrieve for some reason, guess I’m just that intimidating). Anyway, my video gaming marathon will soon come to an end when I start my job at the Empress Theater in a few days, it’s going to be fun to get paid to do the things I love.
I’ve been trying to write more, and think up ideas for stories, plays, etc, but I’ve had little luck so far. I think if I just started writing instead of meticulously planning things out all the time I would probably get a lot more done. I hope to get some short stories posted here soon, even if they aren’t the greatest stories ever written, we all have to start somewhere.
Movie Review: Iron Man (2008)
Iron Man
Director: Jon Favreau
Writer: Mark Fergus & Hawk Ostby
Starring: Robert Downey Jr., Terence Howard, Jeff Bridges, Gwyneth Paltrow
Rating: 18/20
Interestingly enough, this is probably the first movie I went to on opening night purely on impulse. Normally if I’m going to a film on opening night I’ve been anticipating it for years and bought my ticket long in advance of the actual night. This time however, I bought my ticket online after my brother told me he was going, and arrived at the theater less excited about the movie than I would have had I known what I was in for.
There was a few reasons I wasn’t super excited for this film. First the previews made the movie look laughably lame, and I honestly was not expecting much. The director, Jon Favreau, made the terrible Daredevil film some years back, and maybe if Ben Affleck was in the lead role again this would have been a train wreck. The other reason I was not particularly excited for this film was due to my own knowledge on the subject. Unlike other superhero movies, I never read any Iron Man comic books and never really delved deep into the character or the back story behind it, the extent of my knowledge was that Iron Man is Tony Stark, a drunk billionaire. He shoots people with his hands and flies around a lot. As it turns out, the story to this character is quite interesting and more complex than I realized. And while initial reviews on the film were surprisingly positive, I really was surprised and delighted that this movie was one of the best superhero movies I’ve ever seen.
Movie Review: Cloverfield (2008)
Cloverfield
Director: Matt Reeves
Writer: Drew Goddard
Starring: Michael Stahl-David, Mike Vogel, Odette Yustman, Lizzy Caplan, Jessica Lucas, T.J. Miller
Rating: 20/20
Disclaimer: In my review at no time will you see me write ‘9/11′ or ‘Twenty-somethings’ because GODDAMNIT.
I think I was one of the many people surprised at the clever then-untitled trailer of this movie when I first saw it, and at the time I was pretty excited to learn more. When you think about it, it was a pretty well done marketing campaign, and that was actually one of the biggest reasons I was nervous going into the theater to watch this film when it was finally released. There also seemed to be a lot less marketing happening from the first trailer until a few weeks before the release. Nevertheless, I was still really excited to see it and went into the theater with high hopes. Luckily, my hopes were not destroyed, in fact they were blown away.
